Attention Miserable Gout Sufferers: You are about to . . .
Get The Low-Down On How To
SLAY That Vicious GOUT BEAST Once and For All
By Arming Yourself With 7 Secret Weapons
That Even Your Doc Doesn’t Know
Especially For Fed-Up Gout Sufferers,
Listen up: I’m about to let you in on a whistle-blowing, industry cover-up, if-I-tell-ya-I’ll-have-to-kill-ya type of secret.
Those gout meds you’ve been popping like candy are nothing more than band-aids to temporarily stomp out the symptoms of gout . . . not to actually GET RID of it!
Yep, that’s right.
And, you’ll prob’ly find them working less and less after time…and your gout attacks coming fiercer and faster than ever.
That’s what happened to me, anyway.
After my first go-round with gout, I followed all the “rules” of Western medicine and took my prescriptions like a “good patient” . . . certain all would be fine. I was downin my 300 mgs of Allopurinol and daily dose of Colchine…but after a while I noticed I was STILL having a couple of gout attacks each month.
Look, it’s not your doc’s fault…most of them really want to help but, well, they really just don’t know how (plus they’re being held by the balls by their malpractice insurance carriers, who demand allegiance to the pharmaceutical “magic fixes” that don’t actually fix anything).
Looking back, I wish someone woulda slapped me upside the head, told me to pull my head outta my ass, and steered me (FAR) away from the miracles of modern medicine that didn’t help worth a shit but instead treated me to years of gout misery and expensive surgeries to get rid of Tophi (thanks to off-the-chart levels of uric acid, despite the drugs).
Had I known then what I know now, I could have stopped all the pain and dickin’ around with pharmaceutical drugs. My half-assed attempts at using natural remedies would have paid off if I had just understood what to do, how to use them, and more than anything else, if I’d had something to keep me on track.
As the story goes, after a lot of herking and jerking and wasting a lot of time and money, not to mention enduring a super-human amount of pain, I set out to crack the gout code and slay the gout-beast once and for all.
What I found surprised the hell outta me. I managed to stumble onto
7 no-brainer steps so simple, seriously, a 10-year-old could do ’em, no sweat.
But they work.
They work so well, in fact, that after 13 years of living in gout-hell I’ve now been gout-free for over 3 years…free from the excruciating pain of gout…free from the constant, nagging DREAD of waking up with another attack…free from the mountain-size doses of big-pharma toxic meds that I used to shove down my throat daily (which did nothing).
And ever since I kicked my gout’s ass once and for all . . . friends, colleagues, and fellow gout sufferers who’ve heard my story have been begging me to share my gout-killin secrets with them and everyone else who is suffering needlessly from gout.
Now, I’m no teacher/trainer/guru so I have to admit, I was sort of lost about how to go about doing that, but the one thing I am is tenacious, and so little by little all the bits and pieces of the puzzle fell into place and I finally birthed Kill Your Gout FOR GOOD.
So after untold hours of brain-damage getting all of my thoughts, study, research, and experience all herded up into one coral . . . Now I’m peeling back the curtain and revealing the exact steps I took to kill my gout for good.
But instead of the 13 years of suffering it took me to get it right, you can take the ultimate shortcut and create your own gout-bustin’ game-plan in as little as 7 days!
Yep, that’s right, you could be just one week away from owning all the tools needed to build yourself a life that’s permanently free of gout!
Introducing my brand-new, 14-session online video training series:
Listen, if you’re a stickler for pretty graphics and fancy, long-winded lectures, you may wanna look elsewhere. ‘Cuz around here, we’re all about cuttin’ through the shit and delivering the goods you need to KILL YOUR GOUT, all wrapped up in a no muss, no fuss type of package.
Fair warning: I am not about treading lightly or sugarcoating things…so be prepared to hear the raw truth (it may sting a bit, so the faint of heart need not apply). If you’re looking for a feel-good, tell-me-I’m-perfect-just-the-way-I-am type of program, you’re in the wrong place.
But if you want straight-up answers for how to knock your gout on its ass – for GOOD –
you are in the right place, at the right time . . .
And now’s your chance to:
Now, I’ll be frank with you. This is not a “light-weight” program. Rather, this is my tell-all, reveal-all, give away the farm program . . . Where you’ll learn every single thing (A-Z, start to finish) that I know about what works and what doesn’t work for permanent gout killin.
So for those who are up to the challenge, let’s talk nuts and bolts about what you’ll get over the course of 7-Days with these 14 action-packed sessions.
The Kill Your Gout Now Handbook – Your Foundation of TRUE Facts!
Here in Part 1 you’ll get my world-famous Kill Your Gout NOW! Handbook – The Ultimate Handbook for How to Terminate Gout Pain in 2-4 Hours using my “Secret Formula” of common grocery items you might already have at home!
And in addition to getting the “Secret Formula”, this handbook gives you the true gout-facts (instead of the typical gout-bullshit) to set you straight about what is at the ROOT of your gout, and again . . . it’s NOT what your doctor is telling you.
The Kill Your Gout NOW Handbook gives you the Bedrock Foundation for your Gout-Killin Game Plan . . . without this “secret intel” you may as well just plan on being bed-ridden the rest of your life!
Here’s just some of the meat-and-potatoes you’ll get in Part 1 of this program:
The 7 Secrets to Gout Freedom – Your Outline of EXACTLY What to do!
Now that you got the Right Foundation for your Gout-Killin-Game-Plan in Part 1 . . .
Next I’m gonna give you my “7 Secrets to Gout Freedom” where you’ll learn my proven
Seven Steps of EXACTLY WHAT TO DO to permanently get rid of gout.
Here’s a sampling of what you’ll learn:
From Gout-Victim to Gout-Killin Rock Star – Your Road Map to Action!
And here in Part 3 . . . It’s time to grow some stones and stop letting gout have its way with you already! You’re about to go from gout-sissy to GOUT SLAYER in these final sessions, when you discover:
Here’s how it goes: as soon as you click that “LET ME IN NOW” button and confirm that you’re ready to sock it to gout – for good – you’ll get instant access to the first 2 video sessions in Day One. Then each day after that you’ll get access to 2 more video sessions… so you can power through your permanent gout-killin’ game-plan in just one kick-ass-first, ask-questions-later week (or save up the sessions and work through ‘em in your own time).
That’s right, you’ll get all 14 sessions delivered to you over the course of 7-Days!
On top of getting to watch and listen to my self-narrated comedy-club-style video presentations, this turbo-charged program also comes with:
If you’ve read this far, you probly have a few questions. Like:
“Will Kill Your Gout For Good REALLY Send Gout on a Permanent Vacation?”
Hell yeah! In fact, I’m 100% sure that if you actually listen and follow the steps I outline for you, you WILL get rid of your gout for good. I’m so sure of it that I offer a complete satisfaction guarantee…
“So how much is this gonna cost me?”
Before we get into how much this will cost you now, let’s go over a quick refresher course about how much it will cost if you don’t DO anything. It’s confession time: Are you really going to keep letting the pharmaceutical companies rake you over the coals with dose after mega-dose of toxic chemicals that don’t even work . . . just to line their own greedy pockets? Just how much will you let yourself get ripped off before you’ve had enough?
Around here, we’re NOT okay with being duped out of our cold, hard cash, and we’re not going to just sit back and let “the man” have his way with us. If that’s your style, you might as well leave now, Gout Boy, cuz there’s no place for you here.
But if you’re ready to stick it to the “system” (a.k.a. Western Medicine at its not-so-finest), fight your gout head on, man-vs-gout style, AND save a shitload of your hard-earned cash, you won’t believe the deal you’re about to get.
Cuz instead of blowing hundreds (or thousands, more like it) of dollars each year on gout meds that you have to keep refilling month after month (and remembering to shove down your gullet day after day), doc visits, surgeries, pain treatments, etc. etc., you can learn from my mistakes, keep your hard-earned cash, and save yourself a lifetime of gout pain . . . and all for the crazy low investment of just $87!
So what’s the fine print, right?
I’m going to give it to you straight . . . I’ve been catching a lot of flack from people who have used this program and tell me I’m crazy for not charging at least a few hundred bucks for this full-on comprehensive program…and any moment now I could come to my senses and start charging what this dang thing’s really worth.
But for now, you get to take advantage of my insane generosity and the fact that I’m on a mission to kill gout on a massive scale. (So quit your bellyachin and take the deal before it disappears on your whiny ass – and you end up shelling out 10x the dough!)
Plus, I’m all about rewarding people who get off their ass and starting DOING something proactive, so I’m offering this tell-all, permanent-gout-killin’ guide to those who are ready to take fast action toward their gout relief for that crazy low price of just $87.
There is one condition, though:
You gotta get off your ass and do it! You’ve gotta take action, actually get your ass through all 14 sessions of the course, follow the damn Action Blueprints and put this priceless Gout-Wisdom into play in your life.
Can you handle that, gout boy?
Or is it too much trouble? If you’d rather deal with the agony of unrelenting gout attacks for the rest of your miserable life, then good luck to you. But if you think a better option might be Killing Your Gout For Good . . . and enjoying your years without gout’s excruciating, pain-in-the-ass visits, then let’s get a move on.
Click the “LET ME IN” button below RIGHT NOW
. . . to get started kicking your gout’s ass today!
Still Unsure About Killing Your Gout For Good?
I can almost hear you now, grumbling something along the lines of:
“I don’t know Bert…$87 is a lotta money…” (insert whiny voice here)
I can understand why you’re cautious; $87 IS a lotta money. Enough to cover (at least!) a month’s worth of beer. And geez, getting rid of the vicious and indescribable AGONY of one gout attack after another, not to mention the money saved in drugs, treatments, and doctor visits that take you away from work for hours on end…yeah, there’s no WAY all that could be worth $87. C’mon, really?
Plus, there’s the stranger danger factor your momma warned you about – all you know about me is what you’ve seen on my website and YouTube…so what happens if you spend your money and don’t get diddly squat? Yo’ wife and yo’ bro and all the neighbors will think you’re a damn sucker. That’s what you’re thinking, right? Well, buck up soldier…got good news for you. You are fully, 100% covered by my no-questions-asked money-back guarantee.
Plus, your credit/debit card payment is processed by Authorize.net, and it’s fully protected and guaranteed by them (and believe me, they are ruthless when it comes to protecting consumers . . . so even if you don’t believe in my guarantee, you can trust that Authorize.net’s got your back). I’m so confident that you’ll benefit hugely from this program that I’m trying like hell here to tear down all barriers for you!
PLUS, on top of that rock-solid guarantee, I got something else for you, more good news to make this decision a complete no-brainer. Not only will you get all 14 sessions of this jaw-dropping, gout-killing guidance for the ridiculously low price of just $87.00 . . .
But if the permanent gout-relief you’ll get from this online training program isn’t quite enough to light your fire, I’ll throw in a couple of bad-ass bonuses to really get you going!
That’s right! You get my Kill Your Gout FOR GOOD training course, complete with Action Bluprints for each of the 14 sessions, AND 2 worth-their-weight-in-gold bonuses, all for the unheard-of price of just $87!
So I suggest you stop wasting time, and sign up for this video training series
right now . . . so you can GET ON with Kicking Your Gout’s Ass FOR GOOD!
Bert Middleton – The Gout Killer
P.S. You MUST act now. I’m only offering my program at $87.00 until I’ve made a serious difference in the lives of 100 people – and I reserve the right to increase the price at any time without warning. (This isn’t a marketing ploy, folks; I’m dead serious, both about the importance of this program and that the price might skyrocket at any moment!)
P.P.S. The worst thing you can do to yourself is nothing. You’ll be no closer to being gout-free, and your time learning about the course on this page will have been wasted. Don’t give into fear of the unknown. Invest the 87 bucks and get back many hundreds or even thousands of dollars in lost time and missed opportunities because of how this online program will change your life. I promise, you won’t regret it!
Let’s be done . . . click the “LET ME IN NOW!” button below and let’s get you
on your way to a life where you’ll NEVER GET GOUT AGAIN!